Is an Emotional connection a must?
When it comes to relationships and matters of the heart, one man’s food is another man’s poison. In this edition of PeopleTalk, nine young people share whether having an emotional connection (or chemistry) with one’s partner is important to them or not.
Here is what we asked them: Can you have a sexual relationship with someone you have no emotional chemistry with?
Adekunmi*, 18
Not me o. Rara, I can’t do it. Some people are comfortable with having fuck buddies or friends with benefits and they claim there are no strings attached. However, at some point, that whole arrangement scatters because somebody ends up catching feelings.
If I was in such a situation, I’d certainly be the one catching the feelings!
Sharon*, 25
Speaking for myself, it’s totally impossible though I don’t know about other people it can’t work for me. One way or the other… It’s either I like you before we did it or we don’t do it at all.
Nathan*, 23
I don’t think so. Unless I’m pretty stoned and she is, and the only thing we want at the moment is sex, then maybe.
Paul*, 30
I can be attracted to her sexually and that would be good enough for me. Even without the emotional connection.
Kelvin*, 22
Personally speaking, yes. I’ve been in that position before and I can only say, ‘Konji na bastard.’
Seyi*, 20
For me, I don’t think I have to be emotionally attracted to the guy I want to be with before I do anything with him. Mostly, sexual attraction gets me on the move. If you can make me feel turned on, engage me in conversations and generally match my vibe, I might get sexually attracted to you. My interests need to align with yours before we can do anything.
If you can’t get me aroused even without contact, then we move.
Olu*, 24
Yeah, I know it’s possible. I’ve also been in no strings attached relationships and handled them quite well. Having friends with benefits is pretty chill.
Wale*, 22
I am very precise about connection and I find it better to even wait until marriage before having a sexual relationship. So yes, I can only have a sexual relationship on grounds that we have emotional and physical chemistry, plus I must be married to her before we do anything.
Kingsley*, 23
Before I have a sexual relationship with anyone, it has to be someone I’m emotionally attached to. Even though emotions don’t necessarily mean love and all, I can only date someone I’ve connected with a little at least.
#PeopleTalk is a submissions segment for everyday people to talk straight about the twists and turns of everyday life. This edition features views people have regarding emotional chemistry and its importance or lack of in a sexual relationship.
