When sex turns you off.
I’m not usually a big fan of the entire “sexual” aspect of my relationship, and while I’m not sure why, I just know it’s true.
Could she be the cause…
I’ll admit that my girlfriend doesn’t always turn me on, but I am drawn to her. I still enjoy kisses, embraces, cuddles, and other forms of affection, but I simply want to be left alone. I’m not interested in having sex. I have trouble with our relationship at times, and we occasionally battle with a lack of communication, but when it comes time to “make out” after an argument, I would rather sleep than give in. I don’t mind that she’s gained a lot of weight since we started dating. She still loves me and has the same heart. I am not a shallow person, and I believe she would still love me if I gained weight or changed physically.
Maybe it’s due to previous abusive experiences…
I’ve been working on this for a long time, and I’ve had a few partners, including a 21-year-old spouse. I don’t believe it has anything to do with my new repulsion for sex. It’s not like I’ve never enjoyed it. It’s just been a year or so.
Am I the problem…
I have low self-esteem at times, but I work on it, and my spouse makes me feel great about myself for the most part. I work out on a daily basis, take care of physique, and generally, I think I’m doing quite well for my age. So I don’t believe it’s my own thinking.
Maybe it’s stress…
Stress may certainly play a role in a person’s unwillingness to be intimate, but I’m not stressed out. Also, many individuals believe that sex alleviates and relieves stress symptoms, but this is not true. There is no desire.
Anxiety or depression might be the cause…
I was recently diagnosed with a very high anxiety level and some indicators of depression, and was treated with antidepressants. The drugs I’m on are intended to help me “return to normal.” My new “normal” is that I want to keep a safe distance from my partner and avoid any form of sexual activity.
Maybe I’m too tired or distracted…
This cause may be the most accurate of all the aforementioned “Maybes.” I’m easily distracted while I’m reading articles on my phone, surfing around social media, or checking emails, and I’ve been writing a lot recently. My full-time job is fairly demanding, with deadlines and objectives to meet.
So, what’s next?
I suppose I’ll have to attempt to think of methods to make her happy, or to make myself happy, or to compromise. This sensation is quite uncomfortable for me. Never before in my life have I been so passionately repulsed by something. My body feels as if it is rejecting another human being who is approaching me right now, as if two magnets are being driven together and are unable to connect. It’s like getting into a plane and being offered a parachute while never wanting to jump in the first place. Why make a leap while the plane is in perfect operational order?
If you have any advice or thoughts as to how I can solve this problem, kindly let me know in the comment section.
#PeopleTalk is a submissions segment for everyday people to talk straight about the twists and turns of everyday life. This edition is about a troubled fellow and his quest to recover his libido.
