Don’t ignore the red flags!
If abusive partners all had a uniform and were put side by side with well-adjusted people, we doubt if anybody would ever date or marry them. Then no one would cry themselves to bed at night after the person who claimed to love them beat them up. No one would have to come to social media to spread their dirty linen.
Don’t we wish it was that easy? We do but alas, it isn’t. Abusive partners know that they are bad people and as such focus on bringing their best foot forward till they have you hooked.
Because the Tribe wants you to be two steps ahead we have put together seven subtle signs of an abusive partner. Get familiar to avoid surprises so that you can leave to live.
1. They Want The Relationship To Move Too Quickly
It is a good feeling to have the undivided attention of a new person, even better when it comes with gifts and credit alerts.
However, there is a thing as love bombing. It is the prelude to premium abuse and it sounds exactly like the ‘God When’ scenario we just described, if not more.
Our advice when you can’t tell love bombing apart from true love? Put the relationship through the test of time. See how long it takes for the leopard to show its spots.
2. They Humiliate You Jokingly
A partner who jokes about your insecurities, calls you negative names, cracks mean-spirited jokes and uses sarcasm at your expense is an abusive one.
They are not being honest or blunt; they are only conditioning your mind to be submissive. Don’t be fooled.
3. “Everyone Is A Threat To Your Relationship”
If your partner is always coming up with one conspiracy theory or the other on how people are hating on their relationship with you, they are an abuser.
They are just trying to isolate you and have you to themselves only.
4. They Lack A Social Life
No shades to introverts here, but a partner with a total lack of social life is a potential abuser, too. You may not know yet until they start guilt tripping you for hanging out with your friends.
If they see you have a coconut head and continue to have a social life outside your relationship, they switch to humiliation, like say, body shaming as that one is sure to ruin your mood.
5. You Are Always In The Wrong
They are never at fault or wrong. They are the omini-knowest. It is only you that is ever wrong. Even with their well of knowledge, can they correct you without making you feel stupid or blaming you? No?
Please, leave that relationship because one day correction by mouth will not be enough and they will employ their fists to drive their point home.
6. You Have A Bad Sex Life With Them
The bedroom is one of the first places to diagnose a failing relationship. If they punish you by withholding sex or coerce you into having sex after you have made it clear that you are not interested, they are abusive.
7. They Keep Talking About Your Body Count
Questions about body count are unnecessary, in my opinion, but let’s just say you are the type that likes to know, it definitely shouldn’t be a thing to gist about.
If your partner thinks it cute to always refer back to your “body count”, they are an abusive partner.
#Unsolicited is a segment for reviews and opinion pieces. This edition showcases seven subtle signs that your partner is an abuser.
